Rethinking the militant pro-life approach

May 1, 2010 in Ethics with 2 Comments

Abortion was not something I thought much about until I became a Christian. In my self-centered world there wasn’t  room for considering the ramifications of choosing to end an otherwise normal pregnancy. But as happens when Christ invades the heart of a person, my concern for the unborn changed immensely 21 years ago. I’ve never been an activist on any subject, so to speak, but my wife and I have donated to organizations on the pro-life side of the fence. Years ago, before we had kids of our own, one of Bev’s coworkers announced she was pregnant and would be seeking an abortion. Bev and I had all but decided to offer adopting the baby if this frightened young woman would change her mind. It was too late. She quit her job and refused to return Bev’s phone calls.

Those are the kinds of decisions Christians should be willing to make if we truly believe in the sanctity of life. If we say we value the unborn we should follow through with that belief beyond the womb. Joining a pro-life Facebook group or affixing a “Choose Life” vanity plate to your minivan doesn’t cut it. There’s room in your heart to grieve for a life that wasn’t given a chance. Is there room in your home for one that was?

My good friend Angela Orr is a wife and mom of two beautiful little girls in the California Bay Area. She and I have known each other since before my brain was capable of storing long-term memories. Her dad, Dan Skinner, is my godfather. My mom was pregnant with me when she and my dad attended her parents’ wedding. They had already decided my name would be Paul until Angela’s father stepped up onto the alter to receive his bride. That’s when my mom went all Elizabeth on my dad: “His name will be Daniel.” That settled it. After her family moved to Southern California when we were grade-schoolers I didn’t see her again until nearly the end of my senior year of high school, when my dad and I checked out colleges. We stayed with Angela’s family, and she and I rekindled our old friendship. Those first two years at Cal State Northridge were made survivable by the warm hospitality, regular meals, and surrogate care of the Skinner clan.

In summary, Angela is an irreplaceable component of my being. The fact that I’m an Evangelical Christian and she is an atheist/agnostic (my lame attempt to avoid labeling while also covering the bases) doesn’t change that fact. It certainly makes things more interesting, though. She and I have exchanged ideas and arguments about Christianity and the Bible. We disagree sharply with each other, but we remain friends. I don’t subscribe to her points of view on many things, but I respect her nonetheless. So when I read her recent post on the Silicon Valley Moms Blog about her encounter with pro-life activists I decided to come to her defense. I strongly encourage everyone to read what she experienced, regardless of your views on abortion. And especially if you’re of the notion that the use of graphic post-abortive images are a necessary and effective means of persuading others to your side, please think again.

I’ve known about these tactics for a long time but, as I did with abortion in general years ago, declined to form a personal opinion about them. (That’s a habit I need to break.) It was Angela’s post that cured my indifference. Last year Bev and I led an adult Sunday school class. Two very good friends attended and ministered with us. They are the parents of four boys and had already suffered through two miscarriages. Last spring they became pregnant again, and knowing their history and anxiety, we gathered around them, lay our hands on them, and asked God to bless them with a normal pregnancy and healthy birth. When they lost that baby in their second trimester we were devastated. My and Bev’s grief was a just a drop in their ocean, but for the first time I felt like someone else’s loss truly was mine as well. Feeling that hurt and watching our friends reel from their own was the toughest test of my faith I’ve known.

How many women who carry the pain of miscarriage have been confronted by grotesque images of dismembered babies against their will? How many militant pro-life activists have stopped to think about the additional misery they heap upon already-broken women and the resultant shame they bring upon the name of the Lord they claim to serve? Do they really think their ends justify their means? Believers, ours is a message of life and hope, of comfort and peace. Women who have chosen abortion and those who have not chosen miscarriage equally deserve the full measure of grace and redemption in Jesus Christ. They do not deserve the additional scorn and horror of death thrust in their faces and scraped against the wounds of their hearts.

Please stop hiding behind your self-righteous signs of judgment, look these women in the eye, and love them. If you don’t know how to do that, go back to your Bibles and read the accounts of Jesus’ interactions with the Samaritan woman at the well (John 4) and the woman caught in adultery (John 8). Then come back here and post a comment to this blog post about how it’s possible to reconcile tactics of shock and disgust with Jesus’ offer of living water and forgiveness.

  • http://www.faithredeemed.blogspot.com/ Wade Davis

    Very well written and succinctly to the point. I completely agree with your piece. I have seen bits and pieces of the images and videos you are referring to and my gut reaction is to cringe and question as to if children of light should be broadcasting such images of death, etc. Wanting to avoid the temptation to be a reactionary, I gave a benefit of doubt to advocates that engage in the type of activities that your piece is about. Perhaps a jolt or shock of reality is the thing that is needed as a way to frame context and to place the deadly consequences that is about to take place in a proper light; everything that a woman needs to consider and be aware of before she executes an abortion. I’m assuming that this is the line of thinking or rationale that people use when they broadcast the horrific images of abortion. In my mind’s eye, I’m sure they think they are doing one of the most loving things that they can do; expose the harsh reality of what is happening when a baby is murdered as a means to prevent more from happening. The world contains a dubious nature that labels murder as a “procedure” and assures women that they are terminating a lump of cells that we call a “fetus” as opposed to telling them that they are terminating life. It’s the same tactic that was used in war time when soldiers learned to dehumanize life by referring to the enemy as “gooks” or “Charlie” because there’s no reason to have guilt for terminating the enemy, but a man may hesitate and be burdened if he, however, thinks of it as killing men; men with fathers, mothers, children, etc.

    So while I agree that as Christians, we are to exude and demonstrate the love of Christ as you mentioned, sometimes lines become blurred as imperfect men try to serve their Father to the best of their ability. We should always be on our knees in humility and seek guidance from the Holy Spirit and do everything out of love; the love of Christ. We shouldn’t do anything that hinders another by exuding an air of arrogance and judgment but at the same time, we should by no means ignore or belittle the seriousness of abortion. Abortion is murder and my heart goes out to a woman that has underwent an abortion and later faces conviction for her actions. We love and comfort women with such convictions but not at the expense of lessening the seriousness of abortion so as not to give harmful inaccurate impressions to other women that are considering an abortion of their own.

    With everything that has been said thus far, how does everything that we have discussed look like when actually being applied? First, as you mentioned earlier, we are to refer to scripture as to how we should act and to learn from it the infinite lessons that is has to teach us as we trust in Jesus and receive the Holy Spirit to guide us and bear witness. Second, as I mentioned earlier, stay on our knees in prayer and humility and ask God for guidance because as James would say, we have not because we ask not (James 4:2-3). Both suggestions may appear to be obvious but sometimes its the obvious things that escape us and we always fall into error when we deviate from the basics. Another purpose behind my suggestions is that every situation is unique and I fear we may fall into error if we try to lay blanket statements that dictate actions; such as, we should always show graphic abortion images as a way to deter women OR we should never show graphic images to women as a way to deter abortion. Although I don’t think graphic images of abortion posted in a pubic forum may not be appropriate because everyone “does not need to see it”, there may possibly be occasions when they serve a purpose that is truly done out of the love of Christ.

    Thank you for posting this piece, it has given me a lot to consider. I hope my contribution serves as a means for edification and not be a hindrance to anyone.

    If you do not object, I am going to link this post from my blog because I believe you raise some loving and valid points that we all need to keep in mind and consideration.

    Grace & Peace,
    Wade

  • David

    Wow, Wade. Well put!! I was trying to say the same thing, but your communication skills are a bit above mine! I’ve personally seen young ladies that were thinking about having an abortion and thought that what was inside of them was no more than a blob of tissue. When asked if she could be shown some horrible truths about abortion, she agreed. With a counsel on hand and a video screen, she was shown a few terrible pics if what the babies look like and was shown what actually happens to the babe. She quickly broke down and yelled “They lied to me. It IS a baby. OMG. I can’t believe this!” she was then help through her 9 months of pregnancy and was helped in putting her baby up for adoption. She is now counseling young girls herself. If it weren’t for the horrible truth depicted in pics, age wouldve aborted because she honestly didn’t know better.

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